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My Last Gift

from Mixed Emotions vol​.​1 by Summa Riot

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about

My favourite song to date. Progressive electro-rock. Another song about my Grandparents, and the struggles of dealing with grief & learning how to live in the wake of a devistating loss. My last gift? Was a single red rose placed on my Nans coffin as I said my private goodbye.

lyrics

Pierce my skin to ease the pain within,
Scar my body modify me.
I've lost my way nowhere to go,
Nothing to call my own,
If I could breath again,
I would suck you in,
Drag you down deeper deeper 'til you drown.

If I'd never felt pain how would I know I'm still alive?
With all the grief and rage twisted on the inside,
Music and Masochism kept me alive,
A cut across my arm was enough to see me through tomorrow

Cut me open I love to bleed,
Watch the years of pain drip away,
Cut me open and scar my flesh,
Reminds me how I long for death,
No matter what I do it never goes away,
A voice in my head with me every day,
A million memories I'll never forget,
Always longing for death,

It's been years since I died on the inside,
I remember as clear as day,
Last time I saw your face you were at rest in a box,
So still at peace with the world.

How I wish I could see you breath and tell me it'll be alright,
That it was just a dream,
How I long to see you again,
To lay rest to my pain,
My last gift to you was a blood red rose.

credits

from Mixed Emotions vol​.​1, released November 9, 2016
Music by Ben Rayner. Vocals by Danielle Bowman

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